Thursday, July 28, 2011

The good and the hard

Sometimes life seems simple and good. Sometimes life seems a bit difficult. Other times, it seems insurmountable and impossible to get through a day.

But most of the time, I learn that things are simply good because they are hard.

I am in the midst of being overwhelmed daily with anything and everything that comes my way and recognizing the "good" and the "hard" in it all. No one ever promised "easy" but, we all know that life is full of changing. New seasons sometimes seem to come about so slowly that you are unaware life is any different than it was a year ago. until you look around and your knee deep in dirty diapers and potty training. You've cleaned up "pee pee" off the wall and picked up "poop" that has missed the potty once again.
This is hard....but it is good.

Picking food off the floor again, mopping spilled juice up off the couch. Wishing I just get a new couch and a newly decorated living room, and while I'm at it, how about a maid and a night out? Then realizing, oh yeah...This is just where we are right now. Things are tight and messy. But, we have a home, and room to splurge on pizza nights, and snacks for the pool.
This is hard...but it is good.

Awaking repeatedly in the middle of night to comfort after nightmares, or sooth a hungry baby.
This is just hard. but, we are healthy and have jobs that give it's good.

Vacation seems to be a battle of managing toddler food, nap times, meltdowns and tantrums, let alone making it to the beach before the rain showers and rush of the crowds. But then, there is amazement in seeing first fireworks, flying kites, spending time with Grandmoms and great grandmoms.
This is hard...but it is good.

Reflecting the current state of your family and realizing how different it would be if only your mother were still here to see it all. Knowing your children will never have a tangible relationship with the person you so loved and miss with your whole heart. It hurts to see her life gone, but how joyous is life as it continues and we grow our family, sharing "Nana" through stories and pictures. I get to say her name daily when I say my sweet daughter's name.
This is hard...but it is good.

I know that life is full of continued surprises. We always get what is unexpected and uncomfortable. I am thankful for the good that comes from it all.

1 comment:

  1. Just remember there is a little Nana in Miles and Evelynne and she is always watching over each of you. I know it must be hard when you can't hear her voice, see her smile or feel her hug but it sounds like you are keeping her memories alive which is good.
    Love the pictures and can't wait to see ya'll in October and meet Miss Evelynne. A big hug and love to you. Cathy